Want to find your true face? Ditch the Aces to let the eye be. Come true to yourself first before you serve.

Photo by 🇸🇮 Janko Ferlič on Unsplash

Yes!, I would scream, each time I had the 4 Aces in my hand when playing Belote with friends and family.

It did not guarantee that I would win the game. It just gave me more confidence in that game.

I have been taking Improv comedy classes for 3 years now. Each time I am on stage, I also am looking for those 4 Aces on top of the Joker, the King of all faces.

The 4 Aces and the Joker is a sequence of 5 cards with magic powers or a “quinte” as we say when playing Belote.

The pursuit of the magic “quinte” is shared among a lot of artists, actors, and musicians. In short, that “quinte” is what drives a lot of people on stage.

Yet there is a bigger age, where we all are playing our roles, looking for that magic “quinte”: the stage of life.

Two types of plays are predominant in that stage: tragedies and comedies.

“Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think.”

La Bruyere

While on stage, each of us is looking for that “quinte royale”. Each time we go on stage, at home, at the office, at a conference, in front of a camera, on a Zoom meeting, we are longing for:

  • Attention or the Ace of Shades
  • Approval or Ace of Clubs
  • Admiration or Ace of Hearts
  • Approbation or the Ace of diamonds
  • Applause or The Joker

ATTENTION OR THE ACE OF SHADES — We all are going through life seeking attention from others as individuals. Social media platforms are also waging war to grab your attention while you are looking for other people’s attention.

APPROVAL OR THE ACE OF CLUBS — From a young age, we develop habits to seek approval from our parents, our friends, the society we live in. Attention seeking is woven into the very fabric of our digital existence today.

ADMIRATION OR THE ACE OF HEARTS — We are feeding our ego from the admiration of others, our peers, our parents. We spend so much time and energy trying to harvest admiration that we forget to live in the moment.

APPROBATION OR THE ACE OF DIAMONDS — Be it our boss, our relatives, the stranger in the streets, we are always looking for others’ approbation as the green light to move further in the journey of our lives. Sometimes we get stocks because the traffic light is broken.

APPROVAL OR THE JOKER — Each time we succeed in life, we turn our head around looking for spectators around us for their approval. Endless time and energy is spent seeking approvals of people or institutions. Most of them care more about them than us.

We go through our life seeking those cards from the hands of others. All that brings is defeat, disappointment, grudges, and endless tears of sorrow that destroy the make-up we wear to try to please them.

What if there is a way to search for our true selves, the identity we were looking for?

To do so, we have to move from:

  • Attention to Intention
  • Approval to DEferential
  • Admiration to Normalisation
  • Approbation to TImelessness
  • Applause to TYpos

Indeed Intention, DEferential, Normalisation, TImelessness, and TYpos are the 5 five infinity stones that form the gauntlet of our true identity.

Yes you, Marvel fan, I know that there are 6 of them. I will explain later.

INTENTION OR OUR REALITY STONE — By shifting from seeking other people’s attention to sharing the intention behind our actions, we are defining our vision of reality. This is not to run behind people for their attention. This is just to share our intention, from within. We are not denying other people’s reality. We are just carving our own.

DEFERENTIAL OR OUR POWER STONE — By seeking the approval of others, we have yielded to their power. Building our power from within, by believing that we are enough, will lead people to treat us with deference. Not because we are forcing it on them. Because we treat ourselves with deference. So they treat us the same.

NORMALISATION OR OUR SPACE STONE — When seeking others’ admiration, we are tied to their willingness to give it to us. We are always competing with other entities for their limited admiration coins. By accepting that we are not above the norm, that we are just human beings, we are grounded. We build a fertile ground, a unique space to grow safely.

TIMELESSNESS OR OUR TIME STONE — Lots of things that are commonly accepted today were illegal some years or centuries ago. People’s approbation is often tied to what is commonly accepted in their time. By striving for an impact beyond the trends of today, you are building a legacy that will outlive your physical existence.

TYPOS OR OUR SOUL STONE — We often hear the phrase: people have sold their soul the devil for some success in life, for some rounds of applause in this finite world. They often try to paint their success as a perfect life, making them “perfect” individuals. Perfection is an illusion. We all have some typos in our soul code. Just accept it and run with it.

Now you have all the gems in our gauntlet to make us the most powerful being to shape our universe. Well almost. Because, as all Marvel fans know, we are still missing one stone in the gauntlet.

And clearly, I don’t want such a big hole in my story.

THE MIND STONE OR OUR OWN STORY — Our mind is what makes our reality. Our mind is where we build our power. Our mind is where we shape our time. Our mind defines how grandiose is our space. Our mind is where we store our soul. Our mind is why we are crafting our story day in, day out. Our mind is the ink writing our storyline, line after line, building to the book of our life. Our mind is the matrix running the code of our identity.

In this journey, we looked at the external “quinte” of forces (attention, approval, admiration, approbation, and applause) driving most of us, for most of our lives.

Then we went through the exploration of the quintessence of our identity (intention, deferential, normalization, timelessness, typos).

Only through that quintessence are we able to grasp the essence of our life with that magic gauntlet of the 6 infinity gems.

This is the way. The way to craft our true IDENTITY.

How are you handling the Aces and the Joker in your life?

How are you crafting your true identity?

What is your best tip to empower yourself?

Leave a comment below.

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You can read my previous article on The 1 equation to change your life: the 3 steps to unlock the potential of your DNA. Limitless? Almost!

Photo by 🇸🇮 Janko Ferlič on Unsplash

📖 Griot 🧙🏿‍♂️Mentor 🦄 Intrapreneur 💪🏿 Entrepreneur